And in this world of ours where everything seems to happen fast, we are constantly being bombarded with messages, about success, about productivity, about the next big thing. But what if I told you that real happiness so often stems from places we never notice; from the smallest and most ordinary moments of our every day life? Chasing the big, big goals and massive dream vacations while also not realizing the tiny miracles that happen all around us every single day … it’s kinda crazy when you think about it. I have learned (learned the hard way, trust me) that embracing and appreciating the small things in life isn’t just a fluffy self help concept to go from good to great mental health, but an actual life changing shift in your level of happiness.
The Science Behind Simple Pleasures
Let’s get real for a second and see what really goes on in our brains when we live out those small, joyful moments. When we do recognize and give attention to these mundane positive experiences, it launches a cocktail of feel-good chemicals including dopamine and serotonin in our brain, said scientists. But here’s the thing that absolutely blew my mind: In fact, these brief moments of happiness can have a longer lasting impact on our overall well being, than waiting for those big, spectacular events. It is similar to saving for happiness but with little, daily deposits versus waiting for the big, eventual, maybe not check.
The Neurological Impact of Mindful Appreciation
Something pretty incredible happens in our noggins, when we actually take the time to really notice and savor these simple pleasures. Practicing mindful appreciation can actually rewire our neural pathways, and make us more susceptible to positive experiences in the future, research shows. Its like training your brain to be a happiness seeking missile, only rather than looking for grand gestures, its tuned to find you those sweet subtle moments that make life worthwhile. And the best part? This isn’t anything complicated like you need ten years of sitting in a corner meditating or being a PhD in neuroscience, it’s something we all can do starting now.
Everyday Sources of Joy
Happy things are everywhere, and the beauty of finding joy in the little things is that we need to just open our eyes (and hearts). Consider that first sip of coffee in the morning, when the first sign of sunshine through the blinds, your house is quiet and no one’s awake but you. Or walking down the street and taking in a breeze of freshly cut grass or someone’s breathaking cooking. These aren’t random, this isn’t random; these are opportunities for joy that we always zap right past, the way we almost always run past the important events of our lives.
Natural Wonders
The fact of the matter is Mother Nature is giving us a simple pleasure party all the time and we are too busy staring at our phones to notice. Sunlight patterns on your wall through the leafs of trees (I literally stood and stared for 10 minutes yesterday and it was better than netflix), rain on your window when it’s cold and cosy inside, seeing a perfectly shaped cloud and it looks just like your neighbour’s dog – magic if we’re just open to noticing them.
Human Connections
Maybe it’s just a random person, but our interactions with other people are some of the most precious simple pleasures out there. Being so touched by that genuine smile from a stranger when you hold the door open for them, listening as the child’s laughter echoes at the grocery store, or being at peace with all that is said when you are with someone you love. We realize that these don’t matter much, though the fabric of our human existence is woven with threads just like them. After all, 100 likes on our latest social media post isn’t anything compared.
Practical Ways to Cultivate Appreciation
Okay, so we’re all on the joy in the little things bandwagon, so how on earth do we practically go about living this stuff in our crazy busy lives? As far as I am aware, we can’t just snap our fingers and instantly become appreciation ninjas (okay, I sort of wish that we can be, though). The good thing is that this isn’t some complex task that you can’t do — like learning to use ‘Markdown’ — there are actually quite a few simple ways to start developing this skill — yes, a skill — just like learning how to ride a bike or not burning toast.
Creating Daily Rituals
So start small and stay consistent. Perhaps it’s stopping to stretch for thirty seconds in the morning and taking three seconds while settling in for bed to remember three little good things that happened that day. You don’t need to create fancy or time consuming rituals — just regular ones that become habits. As for habits, don’t beat yourself up if you forget once in a while. Perfection is overrated and we all humans.
Mindful Observation Exercises
You might have already stumbled upon this one if your experience in the modern lifestyle of hacking into digital systems is limited or nonexistent: this is a bit woo woo. But bear with me. Choose one ordinary thing to really observe each day. It does not have to be your pet’s whiskers, the steam rising from your tea, or the way that your plants bend toward the sunlight. That’s not to say you have to become a meditation guru, but rather to train yourself to notice the incredible details that are hidden all around. I promise you, once you’re looking for it, you’ll realise how much you missed out.
Overcoming Obstacles to Appreciation
Okay, so finding joy in the little things isn’t all sunshine and rainbows. Life can be downright cruel sometimes and things can get so bad you start failing to see how fantastic everything can be, especially the little things. And that’s totally okay! The trick is maintaining your focus on the things that really do make us happy, even if you feel like you’re not seeing any at all during the tougher times.
Dealing with Negativity Bias
Complaining is a tendency hardwired into our brains because it kept our ancestors alive. In today’s world, we tend so much to looking for what’s wrong, and not finding anything isn’t very satisfying, it can make us blind to see much good stuff. It’s figuring out that this bias exists (hello, brain, I know you’re there!) and fighting it by actively seeking out positives, however small they may be when the negatives are so large. Nor is it ignoring problems; it is about keeping perspective.
Managing Expectations
The greatest hurdle to realizing joy in little things is always wanting more, more, bigger, better. We’ve been taught that happiness is the result of achievement, acquisition and never ending evolution. The thing is goals are great, but getting blinded by them without taking joy in what is, is not healthy. Most times the happiest moments are when we least expect them and in the most ordinary circumstances.
It’s not always a simple journey, but learning to be happy in the simple pleasures of life is more than worth the effort. And it’s about training us to be present to and appreciate the countless small moments of joy that dot our day, even when life sometimes gets hard. And the best part? They’re absolutely free for everyone. So maybe it is all that simple, maybe we don’t have to miss the stars in order to find happiness, we just need to realize how beautiful the ground beneath our feet is.
But remember that in each moment there is joy, we just need to be present enough to notice. If you’re reading this right now, and you probably are, why not appreciate something in your immediate surroundings that is simple? There’s probably something pretty amazing in front of you that just needs to be seen.
Frotpox 